Chemo recap

I am SOOOOOOO happy that chemo is finally finished and I am feeling better. My doctor asked me if chemo was easier or harder than I thought it would be and I told her it was easier. It wasn't easy by any means but as I said in the beginning I hoped for the best and prepared for the worst. I was lucky that chemo wasn't too terrible for me. I think my worst symptoms were stomach related. My stomach had its signals backwards and my stomach would be empty but I would feel nauseous (because my stomach was empty) so I wouldn't want to eat but I would have to because that's the only way to get rid of the nauseous feeling. If that makes sense! I took my nausea meds around the clock for the first 3 days or so after chemo just so I wouldn't feel sick. 

The first 3 or so cycles I felt hungover on the Sunday after chemo. I think because it was the day after my steroids stopped. The 4th cycle I don't really remember because I was so sick besides chemo. The 5th and 6th cycle I had terrible insomnia after my steroid ended which is ironic because most people have insomnia as a side effect of the steroid.

The side effect of ending chemo that I didn't expect was sadness and fear. Its weird to say that you are sad about chemo ending. During chemo you can FEEL the medication fighting against your cancer and when it ends there's nothing fighting against your cancer anymore. Its kind of scary. And that's where the fear comes in. I don't get to just move on from this. I have to think about cancer for the rest of my life. Every pain, headache or weird feeling is going to scare me and that's what I hate the most.

I was calling March my month off but its turning out to be my month of appointments. Friday I chipped one of my teeth so I need to see this dentist this week (my least favorite doctor). This Friday I am scheduled to get my port out and I need to do blood week at the beginning of this week for that. Then next week I meet my radiation oncologist and at the end of the week I have my SIX MONTH follow up appointment with my breast surgeon (can you believe my surgery was 6 months ago?? I cannot!!). The last week of March I have my post-chemo appointment with my oncologist. By April I might be ready to just be doing radiation and not having to see doctors every week!